It has been some time since I sat down to write in this “blog”. The meal eaten alone is not very satisfying. There is an old Hawaiian saying which, in English, is sort of like, “You eat standing up.” The layers of meaning are seen in the idea that you have no place nor people with whom to share your food. You are alone and on the go. It is a strange thing in Hawaiian culture to have no place of community or connection.
Another aspect of community is to see the importance of each individual. Each person has their part to play and the job or experience they bring in to the picture. They not only have to take care of the job of being a “cook” or “husband” but each person must take care of “myself.” When I lose sight to that point I begin to feel disconnected. I can help more when I care for myself. That begins with love.
It can also begin with fear. That is their prefect role, too. To be the gossip and fear monger. The mirror of what we may not want to be.
There is a falsehood that I should be kind to only those who are kind to me. I hope I am but some days I am in my head and may be blind to the kindness. An email goes unanswered. A text message is not responded to directly. There are many small kindnesses that may come towards me that I miss.
The truth may also be that my kindness is missed by others. It doesn’t matter. The only kindness I hope I can remember is the kindness to be with myself. To forgive myself. To allow myself the patience to begin where I am.
I believe one of the greatest “lies” we like to say is “do as you like…as long as it does no harm to others.” I wake up and harm “people”. I’m gay so there would some who say I harm the world for being myself. I am married to man, so I “harm” marriage for some. I eat meat and love Kailua pork. Some vegans and others might say I harm them. And the blessing of my life is I actually have learned that I love who I am and that in doing what I do that harms others (either directly or in-directly), I feel blessed. I love my life. I love who I am.
The other misconception is that the “needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one.” However, the kindness of one man heals the lives of many. The anger of another can turn the tide in a situation. The truth of a crowd is that it will turn on the weakest and kill, trample, and flay a soul either emotionally, spiritually or physically. Look at gossip magazines. They love to “eat” their favorites.
The needs of the one may result in the child who grows up to heal cancer. Or the one who may bring joy to his parents. And the healing of the many begins with the knowing that love begins in each of us. It begins right now. Love is done with joy, compassion and the surrender that it may not be accepted by others.
I have seen some amazing shifts in the world through the gift I see each week in Ha’awina Wednesday. The latest blessing happened with the surrender of “leadership” to see the light of each individual in our group.
We have learned about the individual connection to source from Kemananakoa. We learned about source in each place we live and from the world around us through our visit to Keaka’s horse ranch. And Ka’iminui showed us the healing and acceptance of the lessons from source. These amazing teachers share our table each week. Each week, each other person brings their light to the place we practice. Each person around the table is a brilliant light in my life.
The blessing I see is that the light of my life is enriched and blessed by the healing happening is each and every person. Each individual participating in a moment of love helps me know we are on the path of Pu’uwai. The Hearts Flow opens each day for me.
I truly appreciate the miracle that so many have been so connected and OPEN to share so much of their lives at Ha’awina. The healing that happens and the joy that opens, grows the inspiration within me every day. E ho mai!
It is the inspiration that reminds me that I am in charge of my happiness. I have control of my expression of love in the world. My connection to source is mine to nurture.
Thank you to the many Ohana who have shared their love, their humility, their daily challenges with the honesty and openness of angels for the past year. Thank you to each host and place that has allowed the Ha’awina Ohana a place to sit. You inspire me. You bless me. You bless the world.
Most importantly, you have been a wonderful mirror to remind me that I am the light of my world. And when I am alone, your connection is the gift that brings me light.
I look forward to eating together with you again soon.
Mahalo nui.
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